Uneven Keel

by Invocal

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1.
04:30
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2.
02:51
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3.
04:55
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4.
03:16
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5.
00:45
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6.
05:27
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7.
03:32
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8.
04:25
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9.
04:51
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10.
04:00
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11.
02:45
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12.
05:34
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about

The highly acclaimed full length album.
"An eccentric, eclectic masterpiece" - Out Northwest

"Buy it. Buy it, buy it, buy it. It's a corker. If you get chance to see them live, do that too. Funny, cutting, full of pathos, self - deprecating and extremely talented." - Rhythm Thief

credits

released 30 March 2006
Music & lyrics by R. Swayne

tags

tags: acoustic comedy folk singer songwriter women Northampton

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all rights reserved

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Track Name: As Life Dissolves
She's woken up
In the past
To see it standing blank above her bed

And good for her -
The sun bleaches invisible
The strange things that are said

"I need to be near you and I don't know what it means,
The more I adore you, the more rational it seems."

A pounding thought,
That ricochets between the two -
Head, stomach, heart
Head stomach

And life dissolves,
So neither are aware their words
Are over-heard by others.

"I need to be near you and I don't know what it means,
The more I adore you, the more rational it seems."

There's been a whole lot of talking, and I think you should know
That they've heard all about you, and you've gotta go home
There's a key in the kitchen
And a torch you can borrow -
You'll be fine across the gardens, if you do it alone.

As for you, just be quiet because as you well know
There's the same kind of hatred that just finished off all
Of the friends and the lovers -
Non-compliers and foes
That dared to walk the world without their values in tow.

(INS)

They all arrive
And make her bathe outside
And hope the thought runs from her body:

"I washed myself just like you said -
I cleaned my thought until I bled
I still don't feel that sorry.
You over-hear my love and me
And under-see me, naturally
I'm so damn cold I'll freeze, God damn you."

"I'm starting to fall
I'm sick of it all
I've sat outside everyone for years
I don't even have a single intention.
I'm missing the world,
I'm missing my girl,
You think we'll respond to all this fear?
Well I'm sorry, but you're sadly mistaken."

(INS)

There's been a whole lot of talking and I think you should know,
That they've heard all about you, and you've gotta go home,
It'll spread like a sickness through the chatter and fear of it,
You're running out of spaces that they'll let you just be,
I always thought it would be different, thought you'd be free
I always thought you'd be the things that I've forgotten to be
'Cause I remember you from years ago
Remember thinking secretly,
Friend and a lover
Non-complier and above the ways of
Others who are nothing without validation from a source of
Questionable origin and questionable morals
Don't forget to write a letter to the ones who will remember you
Friend and a lover
Non-complier and above the ways.

I'm not evil, I'm not even near it.
Track Name: Small Anxious Waltz
I've been stuck in the moment for hours,
And still there's no sign of a hole in the ground for me
No!
What have I done?
The words came out wrong
My nerve has disowned me and gone.

What have I done?

You've a house full of unfinished things,
Half an inch oh shampoo in a dozen containers
I laugh!
What chance have we?
If you cannot see
When something's as good as empty.

What chance have we?

When I met you I found you astounding
So promptly behaved like a moron around you
Oh God!
Why am I me?
Why can't I just be
A bit less inept socially.

Why am I me?

My folks came to stay and saw you from the doorstep
Mum said "he looks gorgeous, is he in the forces?"
Oh Mum.
That's not a man.
You don't understand.
Don't wanna go through this again.

But that's not a man.

(INS)

When I see you I find you astounding
So Promptly behave like a moron around you
Although,
When we talk you glow,
Your nerves start to show
You're not that cool either, you know.

Perhaps we just go.
Track Name: Tinnitus and Me
We were watching street performers in the sun
And I cowered as you proclaimed
"Oh the things you see when you've not got a gun"
And wondered why I walked away

You see, you're not comedic
You're a let down
You're a plagiarist at best and
Either you learn now
Or some juggler's gonna get you good
The girl that works at alldays
Will smash in your face
And the man from Marks'll finish you - leave you with tinnitus and
Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

You were born of those almost reptilian
And with climate you can change
I am colder now then you have ever been
And you're conveniently deranged

It seems that as an actor
And a musician
Your plans don't come to fruition
But as an addict
You're surprisingly pro-active
You steal - you're not bohemian
'cos you've no freedom
You can't leave the sleaze you're buried in
You may well be running - you can't stop the ringing …

(eeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeee )

"ooooh lets just get wasted, baby
ooooooh you look like you need it, darling
oooooh lets just erase this, baby
ohhhh and go somewhere seedy… darling"

(spoken)
Well now I have a headache
And I didn't want this anyway
The squalor in the attic
And the death in the living room
I didn't want the sound of a key in a door to cause a rush of despair
And a bolt for the first floor
The man who we owe money to's
Not even in the country
And the bitch who shares our
House won't stop complaining 'bout the humming
And I dunno how you're doing this,
But she can hear your tinnitus
And I can just hear promises that bond us then evaporate
You've really done it now you know,
You've gone and got it wrong again
The sea's full of disease and all the streets are full of people
Who would kill you soon as see you
And they'll hurt me if they hear you so just
Keep the ruddy noise down and just drop it and Christ, let's just GO
Track Name: Dear Friend
Dear friend.
*Sigh*
I've been trying to figure out exactly how to let you know
That you're awful and I hate you,
Without hurting your feelings.
Should I…
Write it in a letter,
P'raps a poem in a card,
Should I wait until you're unawares
And punch you very hard?

But 'cause I don't agree with violence -
I think it's wrong (ish)
I've taken all my twisted bile
And put it in a song! (ish)

There's a reason you don't see me
When you do I'm not on form,
It's not because I'm over-tired,
A bit stressed or forlorn,
It's not 'cause I'm hungover
(though in fairness that's not helping),
It's actually because I've been
Pretending that I like you, and I don't.

These thought as yet haven't actually left my head
So it's not long before I hear the words that fill my very soul with dread:

"Would you like…
Would you like…
Would you like to come to my house for tea tonight?"
What are we, ten?
Anyway. Before I've thought about it,
"Yeah! That'd be lovely!"
I've answered.

Obviously what I should have said was…

There a reason you can't see me although thanks for the invite,
The problem being of course, the fact that my life is finite.
To spend a night with you
When I've so few
Here in the first place
Would be a waste of precious time, and possibly a crime to all mankind.

See, why couldn't I have just said that?
Thanks very much mouth!
Now I've got to go to her stupid HOUSE and eat her stupid FOOD and look at her
STUPID FACE ALL NIGHT!

Oh.

How long had you been there?
"Were you just talking about me?"
No! No-ho-ho-ho!
I was talking …
About

My…

Rabbit.

"oh! That's alright then! Don't be late tonight, we're having tofu and henna with cous-cous!"

I've got my conscience on the left it tells me
"Sarah, just be nicer -
She's very sweet,
It's not her fault
I don't want us to fight her"
My bad side on the right says I've been
"being far too reasonable -
It makes more sense to lay a trap,
And poison her if feasible…"

Oh no!
What should take precedence?
(bearing in mind my bad side's twice the size of my conscience)
Oh no!
Should I be nice for once?

And then, I hear a voice -
It's kinda, like, spritual
Like an angel or
The baby Jesus - I dunno
But it's inside me
Like this one true voice
That makes more sense that anything else in this world…

"Just tell her to cock off."
Track Name: Girl
Girl paints a picture and the morning turns surreal
Her room slants sideways, there's an odd, uneven keel
So what if fall forward and
So what if I fall back,
I just want you.

Girl throws her hands up and the days become unused
She burns the pictures and
No longer breathes the fumes
So what if I've been stabilised,
So what if I've been good,
I don't have you.
Track Name: Floating
Inconceivable - they're unbelievable,
I hadn't planned to come this way at all
But they shouldn't expect you
To drop what protects you
Without it you're tiny and soft and accessible

Please don't let me fall
Please don't let me fall

Life has a habit of
Suddenly grabbing, of
Lifting you high above all you can fathom
Then dropping you facing
The place you escaped from
And launching you over the top
For the hell of it

So why I was partly an ocean
I could not be entirely sure
They truly disrupted my floating
By asking me what I was floating for

At times it's kicking up evenings
That should be sunken and gone
Of you incredible hero
And me incredible con
You soon become a real person
As heroes frequently do
And I just gradually worsen,
Remain enchanted with you
I'm tired of answering questions,
You know full well that I lie
And I'm not in the position
To tell you anything nice

Cos now you sleep with a stranger
And I just sleep in the sea
And though I know I'm no better
You know it's meant to be me

(you may float - I may fall
you may hold other worlds…)

How predictable
That we can't shift it all
Mountains of baggage - your luggage and rubbish
I know that you're in there
You must be there somewhere - if I remove one part,
another might crush you though.

Please don't let me go
Please don't let me go

Often at night there's
A recurring nightmare
Life's got you again
By the scruff of the neck
And I can't move at all
While you're flung against walls
And I'm helpless to help you
I can't even see you there.

Iiiiiiii I cannot sink now - asleep with a stranger
Iiiiiii I cannot sink now - I've too much to tell you

They truly disrupted my floating
By telling me what I was floating for

I started picking up signals
Which I assumed were from you
A psychological taunting
Of signs imagined and true
The scraps of poems you've torn up
And ends of paintings you've burned
that dance and dash down the river
all reach me just to confirm
that you're not properly living
and I'm not properly gone
'cos I've been picking up signals
and you've been hearing those songs
but now you sleep with a stranger
and I just sleep in the sea
and I can't shout any longer
you know it's meant to be me.
Track Name: The Worst Thing I've Done This Year
Regret and Regress
Are very close neighbours,
Remorse stunts your growth -
Don't breath in the vapours

This is by far
The worst thing I've done this year
When I took your heart
I forgot where I left it, dear
I found it tonight
Along with some lighters
That also aren't mine
-Must have been in my bag all this time

Our time was fun -
I wouldn't retract it…
Though you underplayed,
And I overacted.

This is by far
The worst thing I've done this month
When I took your heart
I used it in badminton
I found it tonight
Along with a frisbee
I hope you don't mind
Must have been on my roof all this time

Well I've heard some things
But this is ridiculous
You say that I'm fickle -
I quickly lose interest

Well this is by fa….(loses interest and starts texting)

This is by far
The worst thing I've today
When I took your heart
You asked for it back again
And I said ok (and I thought oh God)
It must be here somewhere (I know that it's not)
Could not bear to say
That I've already sold it on ebay

This is by far that worst thing I've done this year….
Track Name: Hornswoggled
We've been had
We've been duped somehow
Been deceived and cheated
Outwitted and gullible

We've been screwed
We've been stitched up good
We've been led
A merry dance,
The garden path
And by the nose (wu-ho)

So we walked for miled and miles with millions more in London
This is awesome - it's amazing - this is so exhilarating
It's the new style,
Sadly futile.

(It) doesn't take a lot for things to seem improved and brighter
Like when even our Northampton can seem gorgeous in the sunshine-
Well it can - sometimes.

We've been wronged
We've been fooled and conned
Been naïve
Been easy prey
Born yesterday
Kept in the dark

We've been strudled
Gone and been bamboozled
Been sucked in
Confounded
Surrounded
+ Gullible (wu_ho)

Says something when folks agree from every known religion:
"this is crazy, this is madness, this will only bring disaster"
And it has - well fancy that.

When your average men and women say with quiet despondence
"I can see just what you're up to but I don't know how to stop you"
-We've been had - for now.

(we've been strudled…)

Hook, line sinkered
Boggled, tricked, hoodwinkered
Been deluded,
Swindled, skinned,
Been taken in
And Another thing:

We're been humbugged
And weirdly out-numbered
Double crossed
Been laughed at
Been shafted
But dry your tears -
It's just another four years.
Track Name: Madalini's Aversion to Smalltalk Had Become Really Rather Extreme
a-1 a-2 a-1 2 3 4!

I heard a woman took carrying a cross-bow,
That way no-one was inclined to try and speak to her
Small talk, niceties and tittle tattle only made her mean
Good girl
It wasn't that she was averse to interaction,
More that years of serving beer and bar banalities
Meant her tolerance had wavered over certain things
Over most things actually.

"Oh shame! Symptom of society or
Some same sentimental piety
This country's just gone down, down, down.
I say - another scary tale have you
Read, in The Daily Mail is this
Seat free?"
I wouldn't recommend it.
Peyow! Peyow! Pwyow!

(INS)

A-ha-ha-ha-hha-ha-ha-ha hoh!
Now don't you worry Madalaini's little cross bow
Only launches rods with little orange sucker pads
She makes a point of never using actual weaponry
Not since the accident
But even still, poor Madalini gets an ASBO,
Who'd have thought her charming silence loving subtlety
Would lead to an encounter with a WPC
I don't think they're called that anymore.
Shut up, Rachel.

"Oh shame! Symptom of society or
Some same sentimental piety
This country's just gone down, down, down.
I say - the world's gone mad and everybody's gay
And have you seen the weather
Is this seat free?"
I wouldn't recommend it
Peyow! Peyow! Peyow!

(INS)

No fair - they took away the cross bow
Life's tough but you gotta learn'a let go
We all do - it's kinda good for you
These towns'll get ya if ya let them
Close you in with fumes and threats then punish
When ya get a small bit screwy and
Oh GOD enough - I don't want this fuss
Maybe read my look
Let me read my book……..or die.
Track Name: Photograph
Before you got here
I think I might have been just
Staring out of and into nothing

If you use clichés
Then you'll get nowhere near me
Please use real words when you're speaking

I've told you of
A small tin of objects
That help me to remember who I am
And you think that I'm
Bizarre and pretentious
And I think you're amazing all the time.

There is a story
With a simple irony
Children - one young, and one is older

The older cries at night
For fear the younger one will be
Taken harshly away forever

The younger one
Is crying now most nights
Because the elder's actually gone
And you'd rather I
Said nothing of either
So I would rather say nothing at all.

Silence is bad enough
It's bad enough
But nothing's worse than speaking without real words
And I've had enough
I've had enough
The next thing that you hear will be the door.

'Cause I've told you of
The people in my life
The ones I love all in a photograph
And you think that I'm
A long way from virtue
And I think I'm a long way from your heart.
Track Name: Wondergirls
They told me I had to tone it down
Stop getting distracted by things and
Something else that I can't recall -
I'd seen a cat by then

You are a weirdo.
But I'm glad that you're my friend
You talk to yourself
And sing when you want to

I've been on a motorbike and
I've had me some stupid fights and
I'm all full of great ideas so
Phone in sick and
We'll do some silly things

We'll get on a train to somewhere new
Think of the places we could move
Show off and think that everyone
Finds us hilarious

You are a weirdo.
But I'm glad that you're my friend
You see things I can't
And say things I want to

I'm wearing some brand new shoes they're
Good for dancing,
And for kicking.
I'm all full of great ideas so
Phone in sick and
We'll do some silly things

Da da-da da da da-da dun
Da da-da da da da-da dun

You are a weirdo.
But I'm glad that you're my friend
You never give in
And rarely stop laughing

I'm going on an aeroplane and
I've played me some stupid games and
I'm all full of great ideas so
Phone in sick and
We'll do some silly things
Track Name: Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha ha ha ha you said,
I've shot you down and now you're dead
So let the actress now enjoy her final, fatal, finest hour
Hee hee hee hee says me
I'm wearing lots of Kevlar, see,
And where I'm standing, this is home,
You know full well you're not allowed'a

Shoot me when I am standing on this stone
Cos on this stone I
Have made a little home where I am safe from
You and your kind
And if I happen to fall off it
Then I guess you might just get me and I'd hate that.



So through the streets and over streams
and in and out of houses running over fields and moors and shocking sheeps and scaring cowses
Jumping overt things and falling in recycling bins
And hiding down a manhole - I can't believe the council allow this

Shoot me when I am standing on this stone
Cos on this stone I
Have made a little home where I am safe from
You and your kind
And if I happen to fall off it
Then I guess you might catch get me and I'd hate that

So come close, I need to tell you something
Come hear and close the door
So come close I can't keep saying nothing…

Shoot when I am on this stone
'cause on this stone I am at home
Come here and face it, dear
I'll get my own back

Ha ha ha ha I said I've shot you dead
so let the actress now enjoy her final fatal finest hour
Hee hee hee hee says thee
I'm wearing lots of Kevlar, see
And where I'm standing this is home
You know full well you're not allowed'a (repeat)

So come close, I need to tell you something
Come hear and close the door
So come close I can't keep saying nothing

Shoot me when I am standing on this stone
Cos on this stone I
Have made a little home where I am safe from
You and your kind
And if I happen to fall off it
Then I guess you might just touch me and I'd hate that.